I have taken a long break from blogging. One major reason is that I am buried in responsibilities right now. Raising four kids is a daunting task in itself, but add two with diagnosed ADHD and one who is probably on the spectrum with possible ADHD, and there is no room for rest or relaxation. Did I mention that we also own a small business.
Still, I have so many stories that I need to tell. When you are a natural story teller, you have to have an outlet. I was filling my need to write by writing Facebook posts about my family with ADHD. They give me so much material. Last week we had a game night. When it wasn’t someone’s turn, two people were wrestling on the couch, or DD12 was perched on the back of hubby’s chair blowing warm air into his hair. Our youngest, DS7 would wander around and play Santa (in February) until we called him over.
The biggest problem with Facebook is that it is a pretty happy medium, politics aside. I do post a lot about ADHD and share our crazy stories, but while people are okay with satire and crazy stories, they do not really want to know the dark side of your life.
ADHD certainly has a dark side. There is an ADHD Spouse Support group on Facebook, and that group dwells in the dark side, so there are outlets to express frustration, but I really have a great relationship with my spouse, in spite of his ADHD quirks. So that group is not where I can share my darker moments. Mostly that is because my dark moments involve one child, DD12, and not my spouse.
For some reason, we are always supposed to be positive and advocating of our children without admitting with they have flaws. Admitting that your child is difficult and rude is something that your “friends” on Facebook don’t really want to know. I have a child like this. I pour hours and hours into helping this child move forward in life, but she doesn’t seem to care, and she is rude and mean. I suspect that she is rude and mean because of her inability to experience success. She thinks it is because of her ADHD, even though her father and brother have the same challenges and do very well. It is really because she is too proud to accept help and she is rude to anyone who tries to help her out.
I am emotionally exhausted. Today I woke up early to help her get schoolwork done. She is so rude. I have been up until 11:00 or 12:00 every night trying to help her in some way. No appreciation. Nothing. She acts like a wounded animal. I think it is more like a rabid animal, because everyone around her does what they can to help her succeed, but she bites back for no reason. I just don’t know how long I can push her. I am tempted to let her fail 7th grade and learn her lesson the hard way–by having to repeat a grade. I think it just might take a huge failure to wake her up.
So, here I am just sharing my thoughts. I feel like I am backed against a wall. The thing is, my other kids are in the gifted realm. I know that she is intelligent, as well, but she uses her intelligence to dwell in negativity. I am not sure where to go from here…